We all know that the world was a very different place in the mid-century in many, many ways. I loved my childhood but there are many things I do not miss. For example, there were very many social justice issues yet to be addressed in this era. But one thing that I do miss is the prevailing sense that the world was a pretty safe place to go out and explore.
I grew up in a small village and my husband grew up in a large suburb of a very large city. Both of us remember being sent out to play for the day anytime after age 7 or 8 with a few sensible restrictions on what we could do outside. Independence was a big parental goal for children growing up in the 60’s and 70’s. We were taught safety rules, taught how to get help if needed and then were trusted not to get into any serious trouble. We were free to take our bikes and go visit friends or play in the woods or creeks nearby.
My husband was encouraged to learn how to ride the city bus, after his father took him a few times, into the heart of downtown around age 10. When we got hungry we would go home for lunch. Or we got invited for lunch at a friend’s house. And of course we always went home when the streetlights went on. Or when we heard our moms calling us in. I remember endless Saturdays and summer days going out all day playing with a group of kids, making new friends and exploring the neighbourhoods in my village. This was the original free range parenting.
I think that stay at home mid-century moms had a few reasons for sending us out to play for the day. (And I confess that I do not have children but I worked in education for my whole career and know a thing or two about children from that perspective.) One reason was likely that my mom got tired of us saying we were bored. We had two TV channels, papers and crayons and board games and so we got bored inside quickly. Another was that she had cleaning to do like washing and waxing the floor and didn’t want our footprints on it. Perhaps most importantly she believed that kids needed to have fresh air and lots of play to be healthy.
Both my husband and I have younger siblings who were not allowed the freedom that the “big kids” had like hopping on a bike and exploring. But even infants were thought to need fresh air, sunshine and exercise outside. A generation earlier women put their infants into a baby carriage for an outdoor nap and left them on the porch or sidewalk. Some even had a cage like device that attached to a window or balcony to put the baby in, again to get fresh air. I can’t imagine that happens much anymore.
As an infant I was taken for a walk daily even on the coldest winter days. I am told that as a toddler I was bundled up for the weather and left to play by myself for a few minutes outside to “get fresh air”. We didn’t have a fenced yard so I was put into a harness and the end of the harness was clipped to the clothesline. Apparently I loved being able to toddle back and forth on the grass that grew thickest under the clothesline. I actually don’t remember this and don’t have any lifelong fear of clotheslines or anything. Harnesses could be seen while out shopping as it allowed children to walk around the store without getting lost or touching things they weren’t supposed to. They were even advertised as a good way to keep kids safe in the car. There were no seatbelts in the mid-century.
Another item that might be considered a parenting no-no today is a playpen. The earliest ones were much like a wooden crib but close to the floor. Later ones had a plastic netting that babies couldn’t get their heads through. My mother had a playpen for both me and my brother. She said it allowed her to put us in with a blankie and a pile of toys and leave us to play happily for a while so she could make lunch or wash the floors. (I remember the floor needing a lot of thorough washing and waxing.) We weren’t left for hours, just a few minutes. I remember my brother was a real Houdini who soon learned to crawl over the sides of the crib and playpen. I don’t think mom used the playpen outside. There was always the harness clipped to the clothesline for outside fresh air.
I still find it odd to be walking in my neighbourhood on a beautiful Saturday or summer day and not hear the sound of bikes racing down the street or children playing tag in a backyard. I still see moms with infants in strollers taking a walk around the block most days. But except for the time right before and after school it is very rare to hear children’s voices. And it is even rarer to see them playing outside in my little subdivision. I understand the feeling behind keeping kids safely inside but I think that is something we should envy about the mid-century.
What do you think about harnesses and playpens? Good ways to keep kids safe or terribly mean child restraints?